Sunday, February 19, 2017

The misunderstood cyborg

"Don't think. Be a machine, Tea. Be a machine."

Liz said those words to me 4 years ago.

I was reminded of this because Mr. Tea and I had conversation. I said, "Liz is really pushing me, right now. I'm doing more at this time than I have done in the past".

Mr. Tea replied, "She's trying to figure out if you're a cyborg".

When Mr. Tea speaks, I listen. Am I that misunderstood? Do I make it seem like this is easy for me? Do I not complain enough about being tired or sore? Should I talk more about how I felt like I couldn't pedal one more stroke during that ride? Should I mention how much planning I have to do to get this all to work? Even then, it rarely goes to plan?

I'm a true morning person. Not the kind that sets an alarm and gets up to be at 6am masters. I go to bed early, naturally, and I'm up hours before sunrise (without setting an alarm). I didn't know I was a morning person until (our youngest) JMan moved out. Back then, my schedule was dictated by our sons' school, sports & other activities.

Mr. Tea, on the other hand, is not a morning person.

Mornings are my best times. Since I'm up early, no one is at work, and Mr. Tea isn't even awake, I can accomplish a lot.

Interestingly, I'm not an early morning workout person. I struggle to get up and start training.

I know this....I'm far from being a cyborg.

Instead of training, I work.

From 4 or 5am to 8am, I work. Around 8am, I do my first workout. When I'm done, I work again. When I'm at a point I can take a break, I do my second workout. Then, I work again. Because I'm up so early, my workouts (with the exception of strength training) are done by 1pm.

Because of the nature of my job and my work schedule, I don't necessarily work 8 hours a day, but I do work 7 days a week. Thursdays and Fridays are my long workout days because I have a shorter work day. Saturdays and Sundays are shorter workouts because I work most of the day.

My schedule is often tighter than I'd like it to be. That's why I schedule out my meals during the week.

Yesterday was a good example of how NOT a cyborg I am. I was supposed to get to the grocery store on Thursday. I knew we were low on food. I was so tired after my workouts, I skipped the store.

I got through Friday ok.  Then, I had a long run on Saturday. The day after long workouts, I tend to be hungrier than normal, and I had a long run.

I got home from my run. We had no food in the house. I had a protein shake to hold me over, so I could figure out what to do. Just then, Mr. Tea walked in the door with a bowl of Turkey chili from Panera, "I knew you'd be hungry when you got home".  That's why he's the Best Man.

That was lunch. It filled me for a bit. Then, we had Googs 23rd birthday lunchner. I was very very hungry at that point and threw down more pizza than you'd actually think a person could eat.

When we got home, I know my carb (and not the good kind) count is through the roof, but my protein intake was low for the day.

We went to the store and picked up enough food to get through Tuesday. I made some quick lettuce wraps (bibb lettuce and chicken) to get in more protein.

I have a hard bike and strength training planned for Sunday. My hope was to get in enough good stuff, so I can handle the bike.

It's not my nature to complain.

I've learned that some of my best workouts are when I'm sore, and I doubt that I'll be able to do anything.

I've learned that some days that effort > pace.

I've learned that training while tired is exactly the point.

I've learned to be nice to myself.

Recently, someone said to me, "You're lucky that you can train in the middle of the day. Having your own business must be really nice".

I thought to myself, "Is it also really nice that I have to pull money from my own bank accounts to keep the business running when bad times hit?"

We are all fighting our own battles. This isn't easy for anyone. Because I don't complain, doesn't mean I'm not facing my own challenges.

I'm not a cyborg. I'm human. Every day, I get up and do the best I can with the hours I have.

It's not easy, but it is simple.