Tuesday, May 20, 2014

It's just me.

I hate not being allowed to do something.

I hate it. 

I don't like these rules.

I want to be me. I want to be able to take my own risks and not worry what other people think about me. 

If I like you, I want you to know.

But I'm not allowed to.

I want to call a friend.

But I'm not allowed to.

I want to email. 

But I'm not allowed to.

It makes me crazy.

I just want to say: Hey, how are you? I mean...really....how are you? Yeah, I know you a thousand social media *friends*, but I'm the one that actually cared.

And I'm going to see you.

And I'm not allowed to say anything or do anything. I have to act like it's no big deal. AND I can't do that.

I don't even get the opportunity to say, "I'm sorry for hurting you."

And it tears me apart.

These aren't my rules, but I have to play by them.