Maybe I should entitled this post Identity Crisis; except that "crisis" seems a little extreme.
Moving target seemed more appropriate...and certainly appeared to point to my inability to focus on certain aspects of my life.
I got the news I was waiting for this weekend, not good news, not bad news, just expected.
I thought to myself, "So this is it. This is the direction I'm going now."
It's certainly not a bad direction. Think of it like this. Let's say you're hiking. You plan out your trail. You know the trail pretty well. You think about taking a different way but nahhhhh you chose Trail A. There's a comfort to Trail A. You know the path. You know what you'll need. You enjoy it. It gives you a feeling of success, takes work, dedication, and it's not very scary.
But you get to trail A and find out that it's closed indefinitely. All along, Trail B was your backup.
Trail B is a little more scary. You've ventured up B before only to back down after a few miles.
Now, you find out you're going down Trail B....no matter what. You're pretty sure all will be well. It's simply an adjustment. There are more "what ifs"....more unknowns.
On the other hand, Trail B also gives you alot more freedom to travel off the path. There are many little trails that branch off of Trail B. You get to cross rivers, walk over fallen trees, climb boulders, and experience things that you haven't before.
Here I stand, at the start of Trail B.
I don't know how I feel.
But I know what I see.
It's a big world, and I see potential.