Friday, July 15, 2016

One year ago

Accountability is the wholehearted embrace of what we desperately want to ignore.

A year ago, I sat here thinking about my upcoming race, Age Group Nationals. I was excited about the race. At the same time, I wanted it over with.

This is because once the race was over, I was going to be making really big changes. More than anything, I wanted those changes to start NOW. I didn't really want to wait.

Every year, for a few years, I would do OSF; operation super fit. At the end of every season, I would do OSF and fail miserably. I'd give up. Every damn year, I would try again. My goal: drop a few pounds, become a better runner; blah blah blah. Goals we all share in one form or another.

Last year, I was at a low point. I knew I had to make changes. Waiting was killing me. I was so excited to start.

Once Nationals were over, I had two weeks off to unwind. Then, I hit the ground running.

At the time, I didn't realize that I would be doing OSF for the last time.

What started as operation super fit, became life changes.

It started with a complete revamp of my nutrition. It's so hard to look back and say "This is what changed". Everything changed. I started by logging my food; not to count calories but so that Dina could check in on what I was doing and make recommendations. Over a period of a few months, the extra fat I was carrying around was gone. My energy levels increased. My sleep got better. My recovery improved. I could handle heavier training workloads.(I've since stopped logging my food.)

But that wasn't it. There's a je ne sais quois. 

I still can't quite put my finger on it. When I try to explain it to people, I fumble around at a loss for words. The best I can do is say, "the longer I do this, the better I feel". In the past, like OSF, I would do a plan and stop after a month or two. I never found long term success doing it that way.

The plan that I follow is an evolutionary one. There are things that I do now that would not have worked last Sept. When I'm asked about what I do, I really struggle. For one reason, 99.9% of my friends are training for Ironman. My nutrition is very different simply because my training volume is slow low (comparatively speaking).

Operation Super Fit goes beyond nutrition. In fact, I think OSF is a misnomer for me, this time around.

I look back over the past year, wanting to describe what I've done, how my outlook has changed.....and I can't.

Everything is so tightly intertwined, I can't separate them. Nutrition, training, mental focus,'s all one big mosh pit.

I couldn't do the training and recovery without the nutrition.

I couldn't do the training without the mental focus that I've gained.

The hardest one to explain is confidence. Bit by bit, I got stronger. Because of that, I became more confident. Because I was more confident, I was able to take more risks in training. Because I could take more risks, I became stronger and faster.

This is the most fun I've ever had.

I feel like I'm heading into completely new, unchartered territory. I have no idea what I will be able to accomplish, but I'm sure excited to find out.