I didn't want to send my comments to my coach about my workout. I stared at what I wrote. If I don't submit my comments, I'll hear from her. If I submit my comments, I'll hear from her.
Liz demands the best from her athletes. That's why she coaches World Champions. She IS the best, and she demands your best. That's why I hired her.
I didn't give my best on Sunday. I took a deep breath, bit my bottom lip and hit "send".
Within a minute, I heard my phone make the dreaded "beep"....notifying me that she responded. I stared at the message, not wanting to open it.
I read her response, which was a bunch of questions.
I answered her questions.
"Next time, you'll do......"
It wasn't a question. It wasn't "I'd like to see this". It was....Next time, you will do this.
I went back to my training log and looked at the upcoming weeks. I read the goals she posted in my weekly goals.
"Get ready to SMASH those old times. It won't be easy, but it will be SIMPLE, " She wrote to me.
At my last two races, I ran into a woman that I know. I've never raced with her before. I've only heard her stories and tracked her on the IM website. She is a 70.3 World Champion. I was heading out on the run, and she was already heading toward the finish of the 10K.
I watched her run.
Was it a thing of beauty? Did she look fluid? Did her running look effortless?
She looked like she was in the middle of misery. Right smack in the middle of serious pain and intense concentration. She had sweat pouring off her face and a look of determination that would scare off the strongest competitors.
Ever since that day I saw her running, I wanted to be like that. I want to be that person that doesn't give up. I want to be that person that can push through whatever level of pain is required to be their BEST.
Yesterday, I felt like the old me.
And I let myself down. I started doubting myself.
Everyone who has been following me for any length of time, knows this 70.3 will be a PR.
But am I strong enough to give my best?
Am I going to fight for it? When I look at my garmin and realize that if I run just a little bit faster, I can run my fastest half ever? Will I run faster? Am I ready for that?
I've been preparing for this 70.3 for a year. I have goals for it that go back 5 or 6 years. For 10 months, I've been transforming into a stronger athlete.
I looked back over my training log. I accomplished more in one year than I thought was possible. I won't allow a training run to ruin all that for me. That's not going to happen.
When I go to AZ, I'm not going for a PR.
I'm going to fight for my best.