Thank you for all the messages. Thank you for being patient with my delayed responses; and in some cases, almost incoherent replies.
I'm really tired.
I'm very thankful to hear from people, to hear different stories or to (me) just have the chance to say what's on my mind or unload some of my own guilt. (No, Mr. Tea. I don't think this is a big deal. Go back to bed.)
It turned out to be a very big deal.
I'm also so very thankful for our team at work. This was the first time ever Mr. Tea and I both missed work unexpectedly. The team stepped up. They took care of everything. Things they didn't know how to do, they figured out. They covered our work and asked what they missed. They called us in the hospital to see how everything was going (several times). They offered to bring me a hot meal.....which would have been my first hot meal in 3 days....if Googs hadn't gotten me the Chick fil a meal.
That totally counts as a hot meal.
Although I'm tired of medical jibber jabber, I'm tired of explaining everything....I felt I owed it you to provide an update.
Mr. Tea came home last night. He will be in some pain from weeks to months. His lungs are in bad shape. (They look like someone who had a heart attack). BUT, lungs can be repaired. He is on an aggressive medication plan, which requires that I give him shots twice a day. Plus, there are other pills. (At some point, he'll get comfortable giving himself shots, but I don't mind doing it).
Tomorrow (Friday), we have an appt with another doctor.
He is tired, very very tired. He has no restrictions on exercise,except anything that has reduced oxygen, like hiking. We walked around our cul de sac today, and that wiped him out. So, I don't really see hiking in our near future.
The good news is that we know what happened, going back to the week of Nationals, when the blood clots started putting pressure on his heart. All the the stuff we thought was wrong with him....was....wrong.
Better news: He is now on the mend. Some of it will be painful (forcing air into his lungs), but I'm cautiously optimistic. The last month has been an emotional roller coaster. I think we can finally start moving on.
For me, I kept focusing on the "normal". Whatever was "normal", I needed that part of my life. I woke up at 4am, worked a short while, did my workouts, fed the dog, walked the dog, went to the hospital. (Waking up at 4am is not normal, but if I can't sleep....I might as well be productive). I took care of all the household stuff that we normally share.
Today, I had the opportunity to go to the grocery store. Boring and tiresome for most. For me, it was the greatest thing in the world.
Normal felt great.
Mr. Tea is asleep again. I'm going to make myself a hot meal and watch the Broncos in the first game of the season. Soon, I'll wake him up for his next shot.
Everything is normal again.