Sunday, September 22, 2013

Highs and Lows

Last night, I sent an email to my riding group saying that I wasn't going to make it today.

Unexpectedly, I awoke to messages like this: "NOPE. You can't abandon us like that. We'll wait as long as it takes for you to get there. Besides, we're riding commando."

Of course, I can't turn down an offer like that. 

The reason I was going to skip out on the ride was because I went really hard on Thursday then followed it up by a long run on Friday. Saturday, I was in a world of hurt, not soreness as much as just feeling tired.

I ran around the house this morning like crazy trying to get everything done. Normally, I'm all set the night before....but well, I also thought I'd be in my jammies watching pre-game football talk.

When I get there, I was thinking about how I really *did* need to do this ride. I haven't done any significant climbing, and my tour is going to suck.

Just the day before I was saying that I wasn't going to do the tour. I was tired. I was worried about my ability to simply be able to do it.

This got me thinking. We're all riding. There's one hill on this route, and it's a bugger. The last time we did it, I had to stop and walk.

Today, I made it. As small of a victory as it was, it was definitely something that I was proud of. I was the only one who knew about it.....well, not really. My riding group knew. 

I was thinking about my run on Friday. I was so happy on Friday that I did it. I was tired. I ran 10.29 miles. I hadn't done that in a long time. 

The highs and lows of training.

Just yesterday, I was thinking "I can't do the tour." Now, I'm thinking "Yea, I can. The race the next day might be tough, but I can do it."

Blogging isn't really a big thing anymore. Most of the people that I know (myself included) write race reports; or once in awhile, they'll write about a recent training session. We all want to write about the GREAT stuff going on, but I think the bad days equally important. We all have them. Ignoring them (via blog writing) sends the wrong message.

It's not always fun and games. It's not always easy. 

The beginning of last week was NOT easy for me. I knew I needed some time off, and I took it. 

There are days that I would skip masters swim if I hadn't committed to another person to be there.

I would have skipped out today if I hadn't gotten those messages tell me to KIT UP. It ended up being a great day on the bike. Me and my friend didn't get to finish the entire ride with the guys, but we put in exactly the mileage I was hoping to get in.

This is what has been missing for me in the past; having partners to say "I know you're tired, but we're going to wait for you no matter how long you take." These partners aren't just real life friends. They're everyone that I talk to online when I think I really can't do this. OR, I'm just having a bad day and want to skip a doubt I'll see someone else post that they're having a crazy day but they got their run in. 

Instead of getting mad at themselves or frustrated, they just get it done. Meanwhile, I get angry.

I need to work on that. I tend to get mad at myself. I need to stop bottling it all up. If I'm tired or frustrated, I need to just call Coach Mike or ANYONE else---whether they are currently training for a race or not. They know. Sometimes, I just need to know that someone else is tired, or they have no time, so they end up doing a swim at 10pm because it was the only time they could squeeze it in.

All these little things add up to big results. A text message on race morning. Three texts on the day I didn't want to go. A random message in the middle of the day saying "Hey how are you doing? I know you were having a hard time."

I think those things are just as important as those "easy" training days.

How am I? I'm doing well. I had a long ride that I almost skipped, but I didn't. I had a personal "win" on the bugger climb. I had great conversation with friends. 

Best of all, I can't wait to do it again next weekend.